How to Survive LinkedIn Toxic Productivity Culture: celebrating 25k accidental followers 👀
Last week, someone told me that they weren't on any social media. I pointed out that we were connected on LinkedIn, and they said 'that doesn't count'!
This is what makes LinkedIn possibly more dangerous than any other social platform for our mental health: it's social media hidden in productivity. 'I have to do it for work', was what I used to say about Instagram when I was a full time fashion model. It counts as social media, but it doesn't quite count as work.
You are not a product: you are a human being.
The reason I talk about ADHD on LinkedIn so much is because a lot of my work does come from it. Yet when I took a week off, I still had endless people emailing about coaching (with a list that has now hit 500+), corporate training, podcasts, books, collaborations, desperate pleas for support - you name it, I was still being asked to do it.
When I started posting 1 year ago, there wasn't as much interesting content on here. It was easy to post and log off. Now it feels like I am entering another world of interesting people, like some kind of bizarre virtual office world where everybody is a shiny 'brand'.
What we see on here is not real. Even some 'realities' feel curated to get likes, like the crying CEO who went viral last year.
Yet, in a world where we're conditioned from childhood to know 'what we want to be when we grow up', and burdened with expectations of exam results, universities, jobs, promotions, and salaries - LinkedIn is like the never ending Awards Ceremony of 'successful human beings'.
Here's how to protect your mental health on this platform:
1) Remember that most people on LinkedIn are masking: it's not real
Yes, we might be able to see people's career histories and promotions on here, but this is a highlights reel. In a world with mass redundancies and career instability, more and more people are using LinkedIn with the hope of presenting themselves to the world and getting work.
I remember the intense anxiety I had about posting a report I did in my legal job, overthinking every word and how to make myself sound as 'professional' as possible. Social media is designed to make us compare ourselves to others, and LinkedIn is overloaded with 'how to be a successful human being' posts that make us feel terrible for not having 6 figure salaries from putting out an e-guide.
Every single post you see on here is curated. If you feel crushing anxiety about your profile or posts or followers or profile picture, remember that you are not alone. Nobody cares about what you post, because they are all far too busy worrying about themselves.
2) Consider why you're using LinkedIn
I started writing on LinkedIn after I quit my legal job and became an ADHD Coach. I didn't know many people on here, but I liked the format of writing and easily sharing templates to help ADHD-ers drowning in the sea of 'professionals' to access the support they needed at work.
LinkedIn has been incredibly helpful for ADHD Works, because I just showed up as myself on here, and it resonated with other people. My focus was on ADHD Works: not LinkedIn. I've never had any kind of goals around social media or wanted to 'influence' people - what's the point?
I try to ask myself before every post: what is the point of this post? Is it just because I feel like I 'should' be posting? Do I want to create it? How attached am I to the outcome? If it's just because I want to write it, fine.
Ask yourself this for every post you do, and try to check in with why you're actually on this platform. Set yourself a goal that is not linked(in) to LinkedIn, but something you actually want for your life that will make a difference (like getting a job). Then you'll know how to use it with intention.
3) Remember what you can and cannot control
If I had a new follower for every time I saw 'How to go viral / grow / succeed on LinkedIn' posts, I'd be the most popular person on here right now. This is because there is no real strategy, because the outcome is uncontrollable.
For example, if your goal is to get 5000 followers (which as we've discussed above, is not an ideal goal because there is literally no point - your life will probably be exactly the same), you cannot actively break this down into smaller steps to achieve this. This is because the goal relies on other people and external validation.
There are things you can do that may can you to feel more confident sharing on here. A real 'turning' point was doing Lea 🌈 Turner's excellent LinkedIn course last year - but I didn't do this to hack LinkedIn, I did it to figure out how to make a course that wasn't boring. I learned practical tips, like how to utilise the features of LinkedIn effectively.
However, getting likes or followers or comments (or sales!) has never been within my control. So I don't bother. My secret to LinkedIn is getting on here, saying what I want, and getting off as quickly as possible. I don't try to 'grow my engagement' by commenting on other people's statuses, because I spend most of my time writing in hyper-focus vortexes like this one.
The dopamine highs of engagement can easily trick us into believing we have control over our success: we just need to hustle harder, post more, comment more, and we'll go viral and become overnight sensations. In reality, engagement is completely random. Going viral is like winning the lottery for 1 day, before having to give the money back: it just sets you new standards to compare yourself to.
4) Say no: choose how to use your attention
Imagine going up to someone in the street and asking them for a 'quick chat'. I must receive at least 5 messages like this a day, and a year ago, I used to say yes to them all. My days were in back to back 'networking' meetings, where I ended up being pulled in hundreds of different directions, agreeing to 10 different collaborations a week.
I also receive countless trauma dumping messages a day from people desperate for help. As an empath, I really struggle not to take all of these on myself, and to feel intense guilt about not being able to help everybody - but I literally cannot. I am just one human, and I am trying to do everything I can. Receiving over 20 messages a day on here at least, I use templates to help signpost people towards the resources that already exist.
There's also endless arguments and controversial posts on LinkedIn. These are designed to get your attention and hook you into an emotional vortex. It's impossible to control how other people feel or think, so if you don't like it, don't argue: just block them. Enjoy your day instead of arguing with a stranger about things that nobody will care about tomorrow.
5) Set boundaries
What you can control, is how much exposure you have to this. Having ADHD means that I have to stay laser-focused on my goals, otherwise I will end up distracted and never finish them. This means I try to get off social media as quickly as possible after posting.
Here are some other helpful boundaries:
Delete the app from your phone: this is the easiest and most effective boundary you can set. You get to choose when to log on, instead of it becoming automatic.
Use an app like Freedom, which can block certain websites from your phone for set periods of time.
Mute people who you may compare yourself to, or feel bad about. If this is your friends, you can simply explain to them that you're trying to take a break from engaging with social media content.
Schedule your content to post automatically. This is possible to do on LinkedIn itself, and is very effective to help us avoid the immediate dopamine hit of seeing likes or comments.
Have social media free days. It's incredible to remember that the real world does exist!
If you're feeling unsure about a post or wondering if it's oversharing too much of yourself, just don't share it. The world will survive.
Ultimately, remember that you don't owe anybody anything.
Nobody is as happy or successful as they look on social media. I have been the most 'successful' I've ever been in my career, having done the most incredible things over the last year, but it's had a huge toll on my mental health.
I can do big talks for companies, but I've struggled to talk to individuals. I can post about my struggles online, but it feels harder than ever to ask for help ins real life. I can train hundreds of ADHD coaches, but at the end of the day, I still struggle with my own ADHD, in having a brain that refuses to turn off.
I am incredibly grateful for LinkedIn, but please remember to never, ever compare yourself to me. We are all just figuring it out as we go along.
Read the Reality Manifesto for more.